Protect Your Space, Protect Your Peace
For many years I neglected and struggled with learning the importance of protecting my space and peace. During those years I also realized I experienced increased irritability and felt like I was stretching myself thin. As a mental health therapist, one of the primary roles is to show up and be available for my clients. Does this also mean I have to always be available for my friends and family too? If you find yourself struggling within these areas, this short yet meaningful blog post may assist with what you're needing right now.
What I Didn't Know Then, But What I Know Now
During my teen and early adulthood stage, I absolutely felt like I had to be available all the time. I was the person who was easily accessible and hardly would use the word no. So of course that meant Katrina was the go to person. At that time, I also wanted everyone around me to be happy and help in any way possible. Even early on in my career, I felt like I had to be available 24/7 for everyone. When I reflect on those times I realized I was causing more harm than good. I literally was pouring from an empty cup. As I’ve grown I’ve been able to achieve greater self-awareness. This has allowed me to reevaluate and focus more on the areas that I needed to improve in. Learning and implementing self-care has become more vital than it ever has for me. In order to protect my space, I make sure to create time “weekly” for just me. Meaning my phone on do not disturb and choosing to do whatever it is that brings me satisfaction alone. This allows me to decompress and self-reflect on my day, week, and future plans. I have literally mastered this over the years that I'm very proud of. My current relationships with friends and family have improved and I've learned to manage my work schedule better. In addition to this, my circle of close friends not only respect my decision, but support me as well. Listen closely when I say this, don't be afraid to distance yourself especially if you're focused on improving your emotional state. It's so important that you not only implement alone time but you must appreciate it as well.
Balance is Key
Creating a healthy balance is key and helps keep everything afloat. Without protecting your space and peace you set up a path for those to come and go as they please using you only for personal gain. It is emotionally draining making it a point to be available all the time. It’s so important that you learn to put you first that's done in an unapologetic way. If you’re not emotionally stable, how do you expect to help and give back to others? You have the ability to set the standard for your life while enjoying and using the word “No". Create boundaries and stick with them. If you haven’t already confronted those toxic relationships this
is the perfect time to decide when and how as we approach 2018. If this is a fear you have one of the best ways to self-reflect is through journaling (which is a personal favorite that I highly recommend). Jot down the pros/cons about those you struggle with releasing. Yes some may be upset or offended, but remember no one is worth causing mental distress. You have to realize nothing changes if nothing changes. If protecting yourself offends others that’s indication they probably need to be removed from your life. Make yourself a priority, you deserve to live a peaceful life.
Why is it Important to Protect Your Space and Peace?
Helps you avoid toxic relationships that could lead into getting taken advantage of emotionally, physically, and/or financially.
Allows you to self-reflect and think clearer.
You find yourself less stress and irritable.
It shows how much you value yourself and your time.
You find yourself in a much happier place!
These are just a few personal take aways that I’ve learned over the years that I've seen improvement in!Will you decide to protect your space and peace? Who or what is holding you back from making this decision? I would love to hear your thoughts!
When we have peace in our hearts and minds, we draw peace into our lives.
-Iyanla Vanzant